Getting Famous Through Blogging (Self Fulfilling Prophecy)

Starting a blog is the technological equivalent of entering a crowded bar and attempting to make yourself heard through the hubbub. You got the big shot celebrity and sports bloggers sitting at their tables with bottle service and a crowd of sensationalism-hungry fans. Political diehards yakking it up and throwing drinks on each other. Techies and gamers finding people who care about their culture and not pulling much ass.

Entering the arena requires you to pinpoint what to research, who your target audience is, and if you're trying to make people laugh, how to be offensive as possible without losing readership. It's easy to pull some recycled content off Tumblr or Reddit and gain a few followers who have not yet found the guy with funnier captions. It's tough to make it big on the internet when everything's already been done.

The key to successful blogging lies in the distinctness of your voice, knowledge about the subject matter, and dedication. Sorry but that's what mommy might say to make you feel good about yourself. You'll have to whore out internet style to get anywhere. Bother all your friends on Facebook. Be the Youtube commenter that everyone gives the thumbs down. Resort to gimmicks, start posting pictures of naked girls and hope someone bothers to read the text in between. Be warned not even the last method will work if you're lacking the substance in the first place.

Maybe you're satisfied with your mundane personal blog, your amateur food critiques, your fetish fan fiction. Step it up sweetheart. Smilin' Prophet don't fuck around.